Ian Anderson, Jethro Tull

"The best damn cup of coffee this side of twin peaks." Or so a patron of the Flute Center once told me. I think he may have been referring to the Starbucks emporium, above which the Flute Center soars as if on wings of 950 silver or even 23.5 ct Galway Gold. The main difference between the Flute Center and the Seattle boys below is, as I see it, that Phil Unger pays his taxes.

Starbucks, on the other hand, like Google, Facebook and Apple, have a different strategy. Perhaps they are saving up all the resultant low-tax revenues to bestow in their noble philanthropy upon the sad people of Syria or to help with the next tsunami aftermath.

So, with the benefit of the doubt, make mine a extra-frothy Nagahara Latte with a twist of Powell and, on the side, some sparkling gluten-free Muramatsu double-filtered Mt Fuji H2O. Toss in a hi-fat, triple-cooked smoky bacon Haynes croissant for Phil who looks like he needs the protein and dodgy-lipids hit.

Then - off you go upstairs bearing these bountiful gifts to try out the peace-pipe of your dreams. Whether a vintage Louis Lot or the brand new Sankyo International Space Station Orbiting Flute replica special edition. Cut a deal. Don't be afraid to ask. "You want $32,500 for the sexy Swarovski-crowned Galway Cocktail Lounge Bling Nag? Hell, why don't we just round it up to $35K and the next Starbucks is on you, Phil."

Ian Anderson
Jethro Tull
Wit and Raconteur